Grudges

“Don’t carry a grudge. While you’re carrying the grudge the other guy’s out dancing.” ~ Buddy Hackett

We’ve all experienced having a grudge or two. Sometimes it really eats away at you. And, when you think about it, what a waste of your precious time. As we have all learned during this pandemic, time is so very precious.

Experiencing resentment can happen so easily at work, with friends, neighbors, and especially with family. I would say it’s better to have a sit down with the person or persons who you’re having a problem with and talk it out, but I know better because I have experienced how that can go so horribly wrong. Egos at war can really make a mess.

Depending on the people you’re dealing with, you might be able to talk problems through, but for those times that it would make things worse, I suggest writing a letter for your eyes only and let it all out how you feel. Read it a few times, and really analyze how you feel and maybe where you might have played a role too. Then throw the letter away and move on with your life.

Holding grudges will make you sick and it never changes anything.

Take a deep breath. Feel vindicated and let it all go.

“In the end these things matter most: How well did you love? How fully did you live? How deeply did you let go?” ~ Jack Kornfield

Who Will You Be?

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“When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what the storm’s all about.”

~ Haruki Murakami

This pandemic has been our storm, and I wonder who I will be when it’s over.

Who will you be?  You have learned to go without certain essentials, making do with what’s available. Some of you have paid a heavy price in losing loved ones, businesses and jobs.

Do you think about and cherish the people in your life so much more, and have become patient and less judgmental toward others? Aren’t you just so grateful for each and every breath you take and think about the importance of caring for yourself, instead of always being at war?

If going through darkness changes a person for the good then it can’t be all bad. We should all be looking at our life and life in general in an improved way. No fear should reside within us. We are pioneers in a brave new world, learning to do things differently, and hopefully better. Let’s not forget about this planet. How we care for our Earth and its beings will come back to us, and maybe already has not in a good way. This pandemic might be a big warning to get our act together.

So … Who will you be? For me, I just hope that I’m a better human.

“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.” ~ Rumi

Find Your Glue

“A difficult time can be more readily endured if we retain the conviction that our existence holds a purpose—a cause to pursue, a person to love, a goal to achieve.”
~ John Maxwell

When times get tough for us it helps to get through the mess if we have glue that binds us and keeps us from falling apart. It doesn’t matter what kind of glue we use as long as it has holding power. Some types of glue are: religion/spirituality, family, partner/spouse, friends, volunteering, vocation, nature, and of course, pets. Just about anything that gives you something to hold onto and to live for.

You’re in danger when you feel all alone. That’s when you question why you are even here and that no one would miss you if you suddenly died. Yes, life certainly is not always a bed of roses, but with your glue you’ll be secured to Mother Earth and your life will always have meaning.

“Sometimes our light goes out, but is blown again into instant flame by an encounter with another human being.” – Albert Schweitzer

Reflection

It’s that time again where the season is telling us to slow down and reflect on the past year. It’s a melancholy time, but can also be sweet and full of joy. Sometimes though reflection gets lost in this busy time of year, and that’s a real shame because taking the time to reflect is important for the soul to grow.

Give yourself the gift of reflection, and don’t forget to enjoy the precious moments you have with your family and friends. Hold your love ones close to your heart, and drink in the beauty that is your life because nothing lasts forever.

I wish all my WordPress friends a wonderful holiday season, and may you always have happiness and peace in your life.

All my love,

Michele

 

 

Unconditional Love and Acceptance

Do you accept the people in your life for who and what they are, or do you have conditions that have to be met first? Can you love someone freely and allow them to love you back without them having to meet some stipulation that’s so very important to you? I hope so, because this is what unconditional love and acceptance is all about.

We’ve all met people, and maybe even been these people, or have relatives who are these people, that will accept friendship or love for a price. The price is doing business their way. Thinking the way they want you to think, be who they want you to be, and let them use you in some way that benefits them. If you don’t go along with the program, it’s Curtains for you!

“Unconditional love really exists in each of us. It is part of our deep inner being. It is not so much an active emotion as a state of being. It’s not, ‘I love you for this or that reason’ not, ‘I love you if you love me.’ It’s love for no reason, love without an object.” ~ Ram Dass

I like the part, “love without an object.” That’s the way we should be toward each other. We should free the people in our life and also free ourselves to just be able to accept and love without conditions. Just be free to be the parent, grandparent, child, friend, etc. And be free to experience the purity of unconditional love and acceptance.

“Even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, ‘you owe me.’ Look what happens with a love like that. It lights up the whole sky.” ~ Hafiz

Live your life free to be you, and allow the same for all the people who share your world.

Don’t Fear Saying No

As you travel on your journey not everyone you meet or even those you are related to will have your best interests in mind. Treating everyone with respect and loving kindness is an important virtue, but so is being aware and being able to tell when opportunistic people are knocking on your door.

People who tend to be opportunist find kind, loving people, easy prey. And you, wanting to be a good person, can find yourself saying “yes” to so much more than you bargained for. I’m not talking about being asked for a little favor, I’m talking about the big favors that could turn your life upside down. But since I mentioned little favors, they too can get to be annoying.

So how do you protect yourself from being taken advantage of, or simply not really wanting to do what’s being asked of you? Just say NO. Sounds simple but it ISN’T because nice people have trouble saying no. It makes them feel bad. You don’t want to let anyone down and you sure don’t want to come across as selfish and uncaring. But sometimes you just have to protect yourself and you do that by simply saying No.

It’s much harder after you agree to do something to try to undo it. That’s why a loving person needs to think a little bit about themselves and stop worrying about how it might look if they don’t do what’s being asked, or hurt the other person. Yes, someone might get hurt and that someone might be you!

The closer the person is to you the harder it will be to say no. Ask yourself what’s the worst that can happen? So they get mad and stop talking to you and the relationship ends. You have to ask yourself what kind of relationship would end because you said no? I’d say it’s not the relationship that you thought you had and probably isn’t worth keeping.

Be the kind of person that’s not only kind to others but also kind to yourself. Don’t fear saying No when that’s what you really want to say. It’s been said that No is a complete sentence, so use it and set yourself free.

It’s the Season

“Celebrate the happiness that friends are always giving, make every day a holiday and celebrate just living!”

~ Amanda Bradley

it’s the season for life to get out of balance with all the things you have to do. Slow down, take a step back, and breathe deeply before you implode. Remember, the holiday season shouldn’t be a time to make you crazy. It should be a time to reflect on family, friends, and be grateful for your life. If you’re not mindful, this time of year can get out of hand.

Instead of thinking about all the presents you have to buy, all the places you have to be, and all the unending things you have to do, connect to the beauty and peace of nature because it will never fail you. While you’re at it, think about all the love you have to give, all the kindness you need to spread.

Stop the mindless stressing and feel the peace and joy down deep inside your soul and let those things be your guiding light restoring your balance where you can breathe with delight.

After all, it’s what the season is all about.

“Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.”

~ Hamilton Wright Mabie

Laughter

Have you ever really listened to the laughter of others? I was working at my computer the other night and my neighbors were sitting on their deck visiting with friends. I could hear them laughing really enjoying being together. I stopped working and thought, “what an inviting sound that laughter was.” There’s just something so warm and sweet in the sound of laughter, and then I wondered why we don’t do it more often.

It seems like we get caught up in the battle of life–always wanting to win. But battles are such mindless and stupid little things and they don’t contain laughter and certainly no one really wins. Maybe laughter is what life is all about because it’s so light and infectious and certainly brings joy, and knocks the socks out of pain.

The best laughter of course, is that of children. When their giggles get out of control and turn into full-blown crazy laughter–now that’s pure music, isn’t it? You hear that kind of laughter and think how wonderful to be so free.

Once in a while all of us should give ourselves a break and not be so uptight and hard on our souls. We should throw caution to the wind and learn to laugh at ourselves and all the ups and downs our life holds. The benefits of such naughty behavior would be endless indeed. Maybe the way to have more laughter is to choose our battles more wisely, or not have them at all.

When was the last time you really had a good belly laugh? Go ahead, don’t wait, for it might end up being too late.

“Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face.”
~ Victor Hugo

Respect

Show respect for friends and family, and everyone who passes your way. Sometimes during the holiday season we find ourselves in a manic rush to shop for presents, dinner and all kinds of stuff. We get disconnected from the who we really are and drop all kinds of niceties in favor of the holy buck.

Sometimes it’s not only during the holidays that we have no time or care, but even during the dulling times that come before and after all affairs. I know that sometimes Grandma seems to live in another world, but don’t forget there are still brains under all that gray hair and a heart of gold. She’s still the one that taught your mom her abc’s and played with you for hours on her knees. The co-workers that drive you crazy and you think are lazy still deserve your respect, as well as, your extended family that you think at times should just go to hell.

During the holiday season that for some has lost all reason, don’t forget about the sales people who I’m sure would rather be in the Caribbean, or at least some other far off dream. It doesn’t take much time to smile and say, “thank you for all you’ve done my way.”

Respect for people’s feelings is sometimes forgotten, but let’s try to reason that we all have a place in this crazy world, and giving respect to others is the very least we can do. So next time you feel rushed and drained step back, take a long deep breath, and then, continue on once again.