Embrace Your Tears

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We can get embarrassed when we tear up in public, but maybe we shouldn’t. Tears are the way of clearing our bodies of emotion and the stress we carry around. It’s a beautiful way of cleansing and setting our bodies back into balance.

Some people think it’s a sign of weakness, but it’s really a sign of being human and caring. There are tears of joy and tears of pain, but whatever the tears don’t hold them back, let them flow.

It’s true that there are times when you can’t just break down and sob, but you can tear a little bit and maybe sob later. When I’m working with a child in bereavement and he or she starts to cry, it breaks my heart and the tears start to fill my eyes. I can’t just lose it; I have to be there for the child. So I stay in command of my tears by concentrating on helping the child and only letting a few come into my eyes. I also have to get over my embarrassment, but we tell the kids that tears are always okay and maybe seeing tears in my eyes makes that really so.

Feeling joy or pain is part of our journey and so are the tears that accompany all of that. Don’t be afraid; feel what you feel and let yourself connect to the moment and to life itself. We are all just human, so let’s be that. Be a beautiful feeling human.

Purposeful Meaning

 

“The Bushmen in the Kalahari Desert talk about the two “hungers”. There is the Great Hunger and there is the Little Hunger. The Little Hunger wants food for the belly; but the Great Hunger, the greatest hunger of all, is the hunger for meaning…
There is ultimately only one thing that makes human beings deeply and profoundly bitter, and that is to have thrust upon them a life without meaning.
There is nothing wrong in searching for happiness. But of far more comfort to the soul is something greater than happiness or unhappiness, and that is meaning. Because meaning transfigures all. Once what you are doing has for you meaning, it is irrelevant whether you’re happy or unhappy. You are content – you are not alone in your Spirit – you belong.”
Laurens van der Post

The line, “Once what you are doing has for you meaning, it is irrelevant whether you’re happy or unhappy. You are content.” Isn’t that what we are all looking for in life, just to feel “content?”  And how we get there is to have purpose in our lives.

At some point we have to stop all the running around trying to keep up with our daily mess we call our life. And we have to arrive at the point where the crazy thoughts that are swirling around in our minds also must end, and then we can get down to the business of what is our purpose for being here at all.

Without a purpose our life has no meaning, and as the Bushmen of the Kalahari Desert have figured out, we certainly are not going to be very happy, and forget about content without a life of meaning. Perhaps that is why so many of us are living a miserable and unfulfilled life.

So much of the time we look in all the wrong places for happiness or contentment. It’s not found in material things or in other people. It is there inside of us. The purpose of your life will start to take shape and show itself to you when you go within and ask your Spirit, “what am I here to do?” Instead of the material things you think will bring you happiness, it’s found in the things you love to do—especially for others. It’s found in the kindness you spread around and the protection you give to the earth and the beauty you create. It’s the genuine things you do that might not be popular with the people you work with, or the friends you have, but feel so right to you.

As you think deeply about who you are and what you want to accomplish in your life, you will find it will include sharing your gift with others and in some small way, will make this world a better place.

And my beautiful friends, once you find your true purpose in life, there is no going back to the old you. Your life will have great meaning, and that contentment we are all looking for will come to you and you will find yourself smiling for no particular reason at all. But you’ll know why.

 

Slow Down

Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the morning last
Just kicking down the cobblestones
Looking for fun and feelin’ groovy
Ba da da da da da da, feelin’ groovy

Hello, lamppost, what’cha knowin’?
I’ve come to watch your flowers growin’
Ain’t’cha got no rhymes for me?
Doot-in doo-doo, feelin’ groovy
Ba da da da da da da, feelin’ groovy

I got no deeds to do
No promises to keep
I’m dappled and drowsy and ready to sleep
Let the morning time drop all its petals on me
Life, I love you
All is groovy

~ The 59th Street Bridge Song ( Feelin’ Groovy)  Simon & Garfunkel

Learn to slow yourself down before your kids grow up and move away, and your parents become a thought that you just can’t place. There is life outside of work, bills, the disturbing nightly news, and yes, even struggles that plague you daily. And boy, this life can be really great!

Life can be great if you just let yourself slow down and enjoy the simple things. The beauty of nature right out your back door. The silly smile on your child’s face. The warm breeze that tickles the back of your neck, and maybe even the sound of silence when you take a short nap.

The point is, slow down and just be in your life instead of somewhere else. It may not seem like it now, but I can assure you it’s true, life goes by very fast and it can pass right over you. And, no matter how hard you try, you just can’t get it to come back. So, as  cliche’ as it sounds, just stop and smell the roses while you can.

Survival Kit

To get through the ups and downs of your journey through this life you need a survival kit. Martin Luther King, Jr. said: “Our very survival depends on our ability to stay awake, to adjust to new ideas, to remain vigilant and to face the challenge of change.” This is sound advice for keeping you mindful, but I would like to add these components: Be open to the beauty and grace of nature that is always surrounding you; it’s there even in a busy city. Don’t forget to pack that crazy sense of humor with lots of laughter, and remember to put in a note to never take yourself or life in general too seriously. What about worry? Please leave that thing behind, it just mucks up everything.

It’s always good to remember that you need good listening skills on this journey. It’s just so amazing what you can learn when you close your mouth and open your mind and ears to what other people are saying. Who knows, you just might learn something. Also don’t forget about letting yourself feel great joy and simple happiness; they are both essential ingredients for the long road ahead.

And as you start to wrap up this kit, did you place a note in there with a bit of wisdom as a reminder to always believe in yourself even when others don’t? Do include that you are here for a purpose, and as you’re trying to find what the heck this purpose is all about, know it will always have something to do with showing kindness and love toward every living being.

The truth of the matter is that the road will sometimes be as smooth as glass, but other times extremely bumpy. But take heart, tomorrow will always be better.

Crazy Life

As crazy as life can get, don’t let it seduce and eat you up alive. Stay away from the stress and mess it seems to throw at you. Breathe and keep going for life can sometimes become an illusion, but you can make it as real as you want it to be.

Carve yourself out some solitude and go away from the madding crowd. For only in silence will you find your true self and be able to put yourself back in balance again.

“Solitude, in the sense of being often alone, is essential to any depth of meditation or of character; and solitude in the presence of natural beauty and grandeur is the cradle of thought and aspirations which are not only good for the individual, but which society could ill do without.” ~ John S. Mill

Learn to dance in the rain and always jump in the puddles because this is your life, dammit, and you will get through it somehow.

Sweet Memories Vs. Past Demons

“All you really need to remember is that NOW is where the past ends and the future begins.” ~ Robert Holden

Enjoy your sweet memories of days gone by–there is nothing wrong with thinking about and reliving the good past memories we all have. Trouble only begins when we live only in the past and forget about living and enjoying the present. Trouble also happens when we let the past invade the now of our lives and deposit little demons that keep us from being truly happy.

I used to tell my mother if she absolutely had to revisit something in her past to make a very short visit and get out quickly! It didn’t always work very well because she would get herself stuck there and the demons would rain down on her. She would try to chase them away with wine, tranquilizers, and the occasional highball, but none proved very effective. I even tried getting her to visualize lighting a match to the past, but she would just say, “I can’t.”

“Nothing ever happened in the past that can prevent you from being present now.” ~ Eckhart Tolle

Treasure and let yourself flow along with those sweet beautiful memories of your life experiences, but never allow the painful demons of your past to interfere with the life you are leading right now.

Always remember, besides being a good person and giving back, you are supposed to be enjoying your life. Submerge yourself in the beauty all around and in life itself, and never ever say,

“I can’t” because you know you always CAN!